I was never one to patiently pick up broken fragments and glue them together again and tell myself that the mended whole was as good as new. What is broken is broken — and I’d rather remember it as it was at its best than mend it and see the broken places as long as I lived.
– Margaret Mitchell (Gone With the Wind)

I am writing this because I have never  really confronted myself in the ways of love & loss. Until my Mom passed away near 5 years ago now, I never really thought too much about it. Now I do, and sometimes lost love is like a death when there is no more communication. I know this feeling and understand it. What I do have trouble with is selfishness…

I tried to fulfill the needs of another person at the expense of my own, and paid a price for it in the end. This has affected me in somewhat profound ways. I learned a lesson from it. Love is about giving of yourself, not receiving. There are no caveats here. When should the needs of one person be put aside for the benefit of another? Such decisions have a basis too…

For me, personally, I don’t understand anger, resentment and cruelty as a method of seeking what you want from someone you love, for whatever the past may be, when that person is someone you supposedly love or even once loved, and is in need in of your support. I will just never understand such an attitude, plain and simple. But I know everyone has a history too…

One day we all have to face our own judgement and self reflect on who we are. What that will be is up to each of us. There is a greater truth about love, loss and limits, and that is:  love includes loss, and loss includes limits, and limits include knowing yourself. This is something that seems so basic, but is not always obvious. There are nuances that need attention too…

(-) Thought: You are only as good as your last best deed. That’s a lie.
(+) Thought: You are always as good as the best thing you have ever done. That’s the truth.

This seems more a collection of thoughts, perhaps, than a coherent whole – and maybe that reflects my state of mind on my own philosophy. I wish I could forget those broken fragments as Mitchell speaks about, and once broken, they can never really be mended…

Take me back, take me way way back:

 

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