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Let us learn to appreciate there will be times when the trees will be bare, and look forward to the time when we may pick the fruit.” ~ Anton Chekov

Beyond the inspirational message conveyed earlier on my previous bog, Looking Forward, I have some additional things to add in this train of thought. They are perhaps of a more personal nature, so it’s fair warning to turn away or to stay. Ok – so I’ve had some girlfriends and some long term relationships in my life, enough to know what I seek in a wife. It might sound strange to say that the women I have known don’t match up because they did not stay. Let me elaborate, and they did not stay because they were not bound to me in a special way. Ultimately, at least in my long term relationships, they chose themselves or their own path in life. In my thinking, Love is not about what satisfies your own self most, but about endeavoring to satisfy  your significant other most. Hopefully, your significant other endeavors to satisfy you as well, so that Love is a mutually shared feeling.  So, what am I to make of the women I have known? They liked me a good deal maybe, but maybe didn’t really love me, and in the end chose what was best for themselves instead of what was best for our relationship or for me. If you know that scene at the end of the film “The Third Man” (1949) – it feels like this:

I am here in life now and there never was a woman I knew who made a sacrifice for me or for the relationship – until recently. There is someone in my life now that makes the past look pale in comparison to what the future may hold. She is somebody pretty special, with a kind heart, generous nature, and I have a sense she is not someone who will leave or abandon me one day for her own self interests, like other women in my life have done. She is not selfish like that, and there is nothing but honesty between us in understanding and more than that, a real commitment to each other in living a life and growing old together. To all the girls I’ve known before,  you went your own way and the relationship fell short, but best of luck to you. Maybe relationships sometimes just die on the vine when people aren’t bound to each other anymore. Nevertheless, I think I have finally found what I’ve been looking for – someone who will stick with me through time and all the extra things too that love relationships enjoy.  If you know that scene in the film “(500) Days of Summer” (2009) – it feel like this:

Maybe all the pieces will fall together in Looking Forward now, and there will be something substantial to share in time. A chance for a good life together, leaving the connected dots in the past behind to their scattered heritage and following the connected dots ahead to the future…

“Whenever you’re in conflict with someone, there is one factor that can make the difference between damaging your relationship and deepening it. That factor is attitude.” ~ William James

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