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Xietong – Great Wall at Juyongguan

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Xietong – Anlan Bridge at Dujiangyan


“Yet, taught by time, my heart has learned to glow for other’s good, and melt at other’s woe.” 
~ Homer

I have a  fiancé in China and her name is Xietong (or Tong Xie in English). The circumstances of how Tong and I met are as follows: My good friend of many years in the USA (Gang Lei) had a good friend of many years in China (Ping Li) who had a friend (Ning Zhu) that knew Tong. So, we were introduced to each other and communicated in email for a couple of years until I finally came to China to visit Tong in her home city of Chengdu, but also visited Beijing together in travel ways. It was a splendid trip, and she definitely was the person I got to know in email, and then some… In sharing the time in person together, we made that bond a reality. Returning home to the USA, I didn’t wait long before before suggesting she come to the USA on a fiancé visa. Well, engaged in email maybe, but no sense waiting. We are right for each other I think and I’m ‘All In’ so to speak. I’ve come to believe two years is about all it should take to make a plan for a future together in Looking Forward with someone.

I remember sharing a song with Tong before we met called “Falling Slowly” by Glen Hansard & Marja Tuhkanen from the film “Once” (2006). When I visited Tong in China she told me she listened to it every night before bed. That is very sweet, and maybe is Our Song now, something in shared experience and sentiment towards each other for the meaning it has for us. We have some work ahead in Looking Forward, and some forms to fill in government bureaucracy in achieving a visa for Tong to come to the USA with me, but together we will see it through and find some happiness together. It’s a learning process for me in discovering all the ways a government can complicate two people just wanting to be together. Well, governments are mostly paranoid institutions and spy on each while making other nefarious and/or covert plans to gain political advantage in some pointless power struggle. So, they complicate life for everyone in this way. Most people just want basic things like shelter, family, love, rewarding work, and to enjoy life. This is my discovery in traveling the world, but one has to swim this sea of government silliness to secure any satisfaction. I don’t want to get started on this topic…

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Xietong and Me in Chengdu

So this is part of my life at present and I think I found a ‘Real Love’. It is just a matter of time now and there will be good developments for 2014 in Looking Forward for Tong and me. The opening lyrics of the Bob Seger song “The Real Love” says it all:

I think I’ve found The Real Love
Genuine and true
I think it’s really come my way today babe
I think it’s really you

I remember moments looking in your eyes
Could have sworn I saw the spark of love babe
Flickering inside

I’ve been around and round this track
And the only thing I lack
Is The Real Love

I found the only thing I lack now, The Real Love, and it’s just a matter of government boundaries I suppose and swimming the red tape sea. That’s the way of the world and government institutions. Eventually people become free to be people…

Travel blog link: China – Beijing, Chengdu & Beyond (Nov 10-22, 2013)

“If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on.” ~ Steve Jobs

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